I’m sure you’ve heard plenty of sayings growing up such as “what you see is what you will get”, “what goes around, comes around”, and “what you give is what you get”. There are many variations of these sayings that have been passed from family member to family member. They have been repeated so many times that most of us grow tired of hearing them and think they are cliché.
But there is a reason these same things get said over and over again. Most of us don’t apply these wise words of wisdom to our daily lives. When it comes to any dating relationship or marriage, one of our greatest enemies is our pride. You know you want to get it right, but sometimes you get caught up in the emotions and you get derailed from what you know is right.
Out of all the phrases I have ever heard in my life, the one that sticks out to me the most is “You get what you give.” When I feel frustrated and I catch myself contemplating why my relationship isn’t going like it should, I fall back to that one phrase.
The majority of the time, we are in control of how others treat us, especially in our romantic relationships. If you treat others kindly, they will in turn treat you kindly. Showing others respect and consideration for their feelings is the best way to receive that same level of emotion reciprocated. But think about this, when you are good to someone and in turn they are not good to you and on a continual basis you still stick around – know that you are sending them a message. You are letting them know you accept this negative treatment and they can count on you to be there.
It is important to understand that any relationship is give and take. Your partner will respond to how you treat them, as you should respond to how they treat you. Think about it and work on focusing on the positive instead of the negative. When you understand this, it can really go a long way to helping your relationship become more successful.
If your partner is constantly lashing out at you, the first thing you want to do is review your own behavior. How are you treating your significant other on a daily basis? This will give you some direct insight to your relationship, but you must view it with an open and objective mind. You must also be willing to first change your own poor behaviors before you can expect your significant other to do the same. This will help you both grow and work together to change into a more positive relationship.