How can your family, spouse, or significant others help you quit smoking?
A better question would be: Why is it that your loved ones support is effective than your own ambition?! It is the power of influence. Normally, we look up to these people, value their opinions, and while we may feel that the things we do may not affect ourselves in the least, as soon as we learn that they too are affected, in negative ways, we feel empathy. Having built good relationships with loved ones, being a good person in life gives you the advantage of caring for others.
This, in turn, allows you to vicariously feel their emotions toward your addiction(s). It's just like when you see a child fall, cry, or experience fear. You are instantly overwhelmed with feelings urging you to protect that person. You may also have found yourself in some pretty brave situations where you did just that.
The same rules of love apply to you when you're in need, on your quest to quit smoking. Ask your loved ones what they think of your addiction, and how it affects them. Of course, it's a difficult question to ask, but it's important and shows them that you know they feel the pain of your actions. Tell them to not only express themselves, but to go ahead and surpass your emotional pain threshold if necessary, and to make the words count (and perhaps even hurt). Allow them to exhibit anger, a human response to feeling ultimately saddened and troubled. Communicate that the therapy of this shunning, may provide you with the protective instincts to quit smoking (in part) for the people you love, even if you’re having a hard time doing it for yourself.