Some days I feel happy with who I am. I smile at myself in the mirror and I am glad I am looking at me.
Other days I look in the mirror at myself but I am more neutral in my expression. I am neither happy nor sad but just teetering in the land of, “Here I am, this is me.”
Still other days I take a cursory glance in the mirror, shrug at my expression and say (or think), “Whatever” and then get on with my day.
Is this relatable for you too?
Having these kinds of days may have to do with mood and the ups and downs of life, or it may have more to do with something intrinsically deeper- self-esteem.
What is Self-Esteem?
Self-esteem is liking yourself and believing in yourself. It is something that comes from inside of yourself. It is a reflection of how you evaluate your own self-worth on an emotional level. It is the attitude you take towards the subject you know the most about- yourself. Self-esteem is about valuing your self worth and appreciating the person you are. Does this describe you or not?
Having good self-esteem equates to having a positive picture of yourself in your head. You view yourself in a favorable light and this comes across to other people. You respect yourself and know that you matter. Good self-esteem contributes to having a positive attitude, enthusiasm and self-confidence. With all of the ups and downs that we encounter in our daily lives, having good self-esteem can help you to get over the rough patches as unscathed as possible.
Tools That Can Help
If your self-esteem is not as strong as it could be, not to worry- self-esteem is something that can be developed throughout life. Read on for some helpful tools that can raise your level of self-esteem and get you feeling better about you!
Who Are You?
Do you know who you are? Do you know why you think and feel the way you do? Why you react differently in this situation and in that? Self-knowledge is very powerful. Take the time to get in touch with yourself. Spend time in reflection, read self-help books and do some serious self evaluation. Whatever you can do to get in touch with who you really are can go a long way in increasing your self-esteem.
Take Control of Your Life
Taking control of your life involves a number of things. First, you must accept responsibility for your own happiness (and for the mistakes you make). We are all a product of our upbringing, our genetics and our environment but we are also given free will to make choices. Take responsibility for all of this and see that no one is more in the driver’s seat of your own life than you.
Turn Mistakes into Learning Experiences
You will make mistakes along the way, as everybody does. However, this does not have to sabotage your efforts to increase your self-esteem. It is what you do with the mistakes that matters the most. Keep your mistakes in perspective and view them as opportunities and stepping stones to success.
Feel weighted down by obstacles in your life? Sometimes setbacks do not loom as large as they first appear to. Look at what happened and figure out a way to make it work to your advantage. You now have a problem to solve much like a detective would! Go to it!
In the same way, show your courageous side by taking risks that can help move you forward. Take a chance. Even if it does not turn out as you hoped it would, feel good that you were brave enough to try.
Be a Goal Setter
Set goals for yourself. To make them as official as can be, write them down. Start with small short-term goals and as you have success with these, you can set bigger and more long-term goals. Always start with peanuts. Define for yourself what you want and your self-esteem will start to grow once you have a plan.
Speak and Act Positively and Confidently
Pay attention to what you say, how you say it, and how you behave. If you tend to be negative about your approach to life, become aware that you do this and change it to reflect the positive. Say good things to uplift others and do the same for yourself. In the same way, emulate others who have an air of confidence about them. Acting as though you have plenty of confidence can give your self-esteem a huge boost!
Having self-esteem is not something you are born with. It is something that develops throughout life. What you need is to build a strong foundation of knowing who you are and believing in your own worth. What helps knows that if you need help in this department, there are tools you can use to feel better about who you are!