Personal Stories

Baby Steps and Bribery

Day one of truly contemplating quitting smoking is happening. Right now. I am actually thinking I can finally do this, well, maybe. I've been smoking since I was seventeen. I'll be twenty-seven next month. Something about smoking for ten years just doesn't sit right with me, but let's be real, that's not what's motivating me to quit. And what actually is, surprised me. But before we get into that, let's get some history.

I'm me. Mother of two, wife of a firefighter, and adopted daughter from a stereotypical Brooklyn Jewish home (but we transplanted to south Florida when I was a kid). Long story short, I didn't know I was adopted until I was eighteen, and I didn't find out in a traditional way. I had a few rough years with rehab, bad guys and drugs, but got my crap together about six months before I met my now husband. In 2010 we had a little girl, and this last January we had a little boy. Then I got my tubes tied. One little me is enough. We are praying my son is like my husband.

Anyway, I obviously was smoking when I met my husband, though I told him I wanted to quit. Six ears later, he still periodically comes up with new ways to try to get me to kick the habit. Yes, I quit, for the most part, while I was pregnant (I am not proud nor ashamed to admit that). But this summer he actually may have found a way to get me to quit, or so I think.

A few days ago he came to me with a proposition. He said "Baby, What about if I give you $150 a month, that's all yours to spend on you, not the kids, me or anyone else, just you." Of course my eyes light up until I realize wait, this is his newest scheme to get me to quit. So of course I played dumb, and asked "I love this idea. What's the catch?" And then came the answer, "You quit smoking."

So here I am. Staring at my bitten fingernails, chipping toe polish, sad wardrobe, and thinking, $150 a month and I can get my nails done. Toes done. New clothes. Anything I want without having to worry it would bust our budget this month, or feel bad because I should get the kids yet another new fancy outfit. Money to pamper myself some, or go out or do whatever I want with and all I have to do is quit smoking. I finally have a carrot dangling in front of me to actually get me moving on the quitting process that I have honestly wanted to do for some time now.

So, I think I'll try it. I mean, my kids need a mom and I don't want to be on one of those "Quit Florida" commercials with a hole in my throat.

How Convenient Stores are Helpful in Eradicating Smoking

The law makes it so that many eager smokers aren’t able to obtain their nicotine. In its own way, closing off the bridge to the addiction is surely helping many individuals to quit or never smoke to begin with. I worked at Walgreens for about six months, and do you know what I loved? I loved that it is against the law to sell cigarettes to minors. It doesn’t stop there.

I was required to ask for ID if anyone requesting a package of cigarettes looked under the age of 35. What this means to a smoke-free advocate is that even minors who looked over 21, and would fool your average employee, wouldn’t be purchasing cigarettes from me. Young adults who looked to be in the early twenties, who normally don’t get carded in their local stores, and would leave behind or forget proper identification also wouldn’t be buying any cigs. They would often behave as if they thought it was way too much of a hassle to go to their cars, or they simply left their identification at home. At the end of every shift, many people went smoke free, unwillingly. It was, however, to their benefit, because smoking kills.

Preventing smoking is just as good as quitting smoking. Policies like the ones that Walgreens have, are inspiring. I believe that education and awareness are key to realizing bad choices. My customers may not have been satisfied with their Walgreens service, but they left well aware that for the time being they wouldn’t be taking a drag. This is very helpful for someone involved in a support group for smoking. All it takes is a second to reflect, and it may change and encourage a better way of living.

It Sucks to Get Sucked in to Sucking Butts!

A friend of mine started smoking when she was going through a difficult time in a relationship and with other family stress. It started out as only a "once-in-while" thing, just as a quick and easy stress reliever. At every point along the way, she thought she could quit any time she wanted.

At first, it was only a couple times a week. That lasted about a year, and since the relationship issue and other stressors weren't resolved, the stress was still there. What had started out as something she intended to be a temporary thing, was at that point something that had gone on for a year.

It's amazing how quickly time flies, and how fast suddenly a year can go by. Not only had she not quit, but now she was up to twice a day instead of twice a week, probably spurred on by the fact that the stressors in her life had increased rather than decreased. Now, something that was supposed to be something to easily quit at any point she wanted to, had become a harmful habit.

Fortunately, when she was called out on the fact that she was increasing her habit, and was smoking twice a day, she realized what she had done, and with a lot of effort, and support, she was able to quit at that point. But I always think of her when I think about the addictiveness of smoking. It's so easy to get sucked in, and it's a slippery slope.

Don't start! Don't let tobacco trick you into thinking that it's just temporary and that you can easily quit any time. While it's true that YOU CAN QUIT ANYTIME that you put your mind to it (in fact, that's precisely what you need to do), it very quickly turns into an addictive habit that is NOT EASY to stop any old time you decide you're done. It will most likely take a huge effort, thus sucking more time, thought, and energy away from the important things in your life.

So the moral of the story is, don't get sucked in, in the first place. Find support for dealing with the stresses in your life. Find healthy ways to combat stress. Don't be fooled into thinking that you are stronger than this addictive substance Because it's powerfully addictive, so don't get sucked in, because sucking butts sucks!

 

 

*Image courtesy Flickr creative commons.

The Day I Finally Bought an E-Cigarette and Read the Funny Manual

Today, I finally bought an e-cigarette. Since the website has a particular brand that it is promoting, I will not mention the name of the one I bought. I purchased the e-cigarette, along with my regular supply of Marlboro Lights Gold that I routinely buy every grocery day. The decision was impulsive, it's true. The thought process that lead me to it was simpler. It only cost 250 pesos or $6, more or less. But Danny, what about the health consequences?

I didn't do much research, as price and taste were the only things on my mind. Now before you criticize me, I'd like to tell you that the same thing is on my mind whenever I purchase my regular cigarettes. The same thought process subliminally courses its way from my head to my fingers which then reaches for my wallet. The formula was simple: A + T + Hq = Buy Affordable (A) + Taste (T) + Help me quit (Hq) =Buy.

 The sales lady didn't even do a good job of trying to sell it to me. “Sir, since you already opened it, you're already going to buy it,.” she said in a matter of fact way. I was like, “Ummm, okay. I just wanted to try it but okay.” It tasted like burning plastic. As an experienced smoker, this was my initial impression of it. I promptly told the sales lady my opinion. “Sir, that's because the butt of the cigarette is made of plastic.” I sometimes wish that I could do that trademark Elvis Presley smirk. (See "Pawnshop Chronicles", starring Brendan Frasier.)

I had my own, but it didn't quite have the same desired effect. She promptly got a bottle of some liquid, sprinkled it in the opened red cartridge, and gave it back to me. I tried it again. This time, it tasted like chocolate. What a trick.

Initial impressions: It had too many wires and stuff. Now it only has one set of wires that could be plugged in a USB port, but for me, that's too much. Okay, I guess it needs to be charged. The e-cigarette is as heavy as 10 real sticks. Now, I work a green collar job. As a gardener/farmer, I oftentimes carry a pack of cigarettes with me whenever I work. Sometimes you'd find me like a duck with a stick on its mouth squatting on the mud, puffing smoke like there's no tomorrow. Such an image would no longer apply now that I have my e-cigarette. I'd look far more sophisticated.

It makes a funny wheezing sound whenever I sip it. I don't know whether this is a feature or an advantage, but I certainly wouldn't want the person sitting next to me think that I'm on something. I could compare the sound it makes to my asthma inhaler. Come to think of it, maybe they should include a ring tone, so wenever I sip it, would play the Game of Thrones theme song or something. It doesn't make me feel like a dragon. I am a pretend dragon. One of my triggers are people. I smoke when I am around people who stress me out. That's my weird defense mechanism. The e-cigarette does not make me feel like I'm a dragon. Because of its weird wheezing sound, it makes me feel like an asthmatic.

I have to buy mosquito repellants. One of the weird reasons why I smoke while working on the garden is I have this strange belief that the smoke from my cigarettes repels mosquitoes. I don't know if it really does that or if it just makes the nerves of my skin dull, but for me it works that way. I doubt that the vapor from the e-cigarette would kill the mosquitoes. It does not provide me with that “artificial warmth”. Remember when I said that smoking makes me feel like a dragon? That's also because the heat of the cigarette makes me feel warm inside. The e-cigarette does not achieve this. But In all seriousness, I still like it. If my little experiment works and I am somehow weaned from real cigarettes, I'm hoping that I could finally quit both cigarettes and e-cigarettes. The thing that's working for me right now is that whenever I feel that pull, I could just reach in my pocket and grab my handy dandy e-cigarette.

 

Read the ridiculously funny e-cigarette manual.

Yeah, it’s All That

I had been an off-and-on smoker for perhaps forty years. When I smoked, (and there were long periods when I didn't pick up), I smoked cigarettes, pipes, and cigars. I always had the idea that I could take them or leave them. That worked for awhile, but as the years stretched on, I felt that ability slipping away into serious addiction. Funny how addicts can rationalize, deny, intellectualize, and use every other manner of defense mechanism in order to protect their addiction. A friend had smoked heavily during pregnancy and as a result her baby was born prematurely. He was so small that my wedding ring fit over his small hand. It was a miracle that he even survived.

Was that enough to get me to reconsider my addiction? Hardly. I was still smoking even as I ran competitive 5 and 10k races. Certainly incongruent, if not insane in some small manner. I had heard that nicotine addiction could be harder to break than a stubborn crack habit. I watched as friends and relatives died of heart disease and lung cancer. Lovely people reduced by chronic pulmonary obstructive disease to a state of barely functioning as a result of smoking. I certainly had some motivation to quit then, didn't I? I'd quit for awhile and then go back for no good reason. Sound familiar? It was then I had the great fortune to be able to work with alcoholics, cocaine addicts, and crackheads. A good number of these addicts are helped by a twelve step program in which the main rule is to stay clean for 24 hours.

Those in AA have a motto: "One Day at a Time". I noted that there are a lot of differing methods people have used to quit smoking- hypnosis, nicotine lozenges, cold turkey. I tried the cold turkey method, but I also used the principles and actions of the 12 step program as my support group in order to break this sorrowful cycle. I can now state that I have been smoke free for 8 months and feel a renewal of spirit and energy, a sublime happiness. May you find the method that works for you, but do it now. Make a call to 1-800-QUIT, get a hypnosis session, talk with your doctor. You will be serenely happy that you finally got free.

Big Thank You to BH and the Community

Hello everyone!

To the breathinghappy.com people, the community and the readers, on behalf of my family we’d like to thank everyone!

With my breathinghappy.com earnings from writing, I was able to take my family out last July 25. We had a blast. It was Ally’s 9th birthday and they rode a carousel. Mommy rode the carousel too!  Read more

COPD – Give Up Smoking Before It’s Too Late!

My friend Carole was really looking forward to her approaching retirement. There was so much she would at last have the time to do; playing golf, tennis and bridge with her many friends, walking through the forest with her dog and finally getting around to booking the cycling holidays she has always promised herself. She knew Read more

My Sweet Little Smoker

My daughter is planning on quitting smoking July 29th. She has had the habit for about 30 years. She is 41 now. She has tried to stop several times in the past but hasn't been sucessful.

I have talked to her about how great she should feel after getting all the toxins out of her system. She wants to feel better.

Having done quite a bit of research for the articles I have written on Breathing Happy, there were several things I knew could be hard for a person wanting to quit the habit. For instance, I know about triggers and know what they are is very important. And know what the alternative is that if she continued to smoke, she was in for trouble. This was something I felt was imporant. I have written several articles on COPD recently ,and how it effects a person's life. There are millions of Americans with the disease. I didn't want my daughter to be one of them.

I watched my grandfather die of emphasema. He had smoked for probably 50-60 years. Salems. I was a little girl about six or seven then and I remember watching my grandfather just trying to get into the bathroom to shave in the mornings. He would start out on the couch after breakfast and would get up and walk over to the table in the living room, probably four feet away from the couch. He would grip the table for several seconds, breathing heavier than usual. Then he would move on to the door jam in the hallway about five or six feet away. He would stand there bent over a bit, breathing heavy. Then after a short rest with the breathing, he would move across the hall and into the bathroom and grip the sink, now breathing heavy from whole the ordeal. He would stand there gripping the sink, leaning as he slowly shaved himself.

This went on until one day he came out and set in the big over stuffed chair in the livng room after shaving and died there. I don't want this to happen to my daughter. She has a ten year old son who loves her and needs her around. He really stresses her out sometimes. And she has a boyfriend who smokes like a chimney. With these two components to work around, it may not be easy for her.

July 29th will be here very soon. I certainly wish her luck.

Quitting Cold Turkey

I smoked as a teen. It was more an act of rebellion than anything else, but I liked it as a social device, as well. If you saw a cute guy, you could always ask him for a light to break the tension. You could smoke with your friends, too.

When my grandfather was diagnosed with lung cancer, I decided to quit. He was a pack a day smoker for most of his 80 years and I knew I could easily end up just like him. And so I dropped the cigarettes.

The problem is that I have a very addictive personality. If you give me one smoke, I’ll take the pack. It’s one of the issues that has also led to weight problems for me. So, when I decided to give up smoking, I knew there was no way I was going to make it if I tried to gradually work down to zero. Going cold turkey was the only way to go for me. It was certainly not easy, but it was necessary.

At the age of 21, I tossed my last pack in the garbage, fought my desire to pull it right back out and finish it up, and I walked away. The first few days were the worst. I was jittery and constantly reaching for the smokes that weren’t there anymore.

I stayed far away from my smoking friends and I basically holed up in my room when I wasn’t at work. It wasn’t fun, but in the end, I got through it. The desire to smoke didn’t go away though, for a long time. Even now, nearly 20 years later, I still want to smoke sometimes! The trick is to make the decision each minute of each day. “I’m not going to smoke.”

Distraction helped a lot, too. I spent a lot of time reading or watching TV to keep my mind off things. However, since I quit cold turkey, I’ve had one cigarette in nearly all those 20 years. Not too bad, I think! I can proudly say that my children will not be subjected to second hand smoke and that makes it all very worth it.