What is it about sadness that scares us so much?
I would love to share my thoughts about sadness because I’ve recently found joy after a great loss. I have learned so much about this whole experience that I want to enumerate all the things I’ve picked up from it.
When I pause and look back on the course of my life so far, I put emphasis on the lows much more deeply than I’ve ever stopped to consider the highs; not because I like being sad, but because I know enough to know just how significant and life-changing those flashes of sadness and lowness are.
Three years ago, when I experienced pain and sadness because of a broken heart, I knew that everything would come to pass. I knew that another chapter would unfold afterwards. I was absolutely sure that it was happiness. It’s an exciting thought to wait for happiness amidst the pain.
Completeness is what we should be striving for and part of that is sadness, failure, disappointment, anger and frustration. All of those things are part of the whole, and they are part of us. Victory boosts our confidence, but it doesn’t teach us to stand up and get to know more about ourselves.
A good example of sadness is death. Death doesn’t particularly seem like an inviting episode, but when we’re confronted with an empty bed, a space where someone should be sitting, we experience a backtrack of memories, the most basic moments of happiness. The hardest part is when memory stays with you, encloses you and, on peak days, swallows you whole. It burns like a wound that refuses to heal and makes you feel empty with regrets and unanswered questions. It makes you desire for another try to reverse the episodes you loved the most.
Of course, we’re not encouraged to stop and savor the sadness. There will always be the phase of moving on, waking up and smiling again. What you need to realize is the fact that the lows will give you much more compared to the highs. In the darkness and emptiness, you will find the light of joy. In sadness, you will feel like anything is possible because you’ve got nothing to lose. Answers will suddenly come in, and you will have time to reflect and assess the things around you.
The problem with being happy most of the time is that it doesn’t teach you anything. Certainly, we experience happiness, and we love the idea of embracing it. However, we aren’t created for eternal happiness. As much as we want to, we can’t hold on to it forever.
There is something that is just so extremely magical about being sad. You don’t know what will come next and you are thrilled to leave everything to fate. Hoping is an innate human instinct, and embracing it makes you feel alive and genuine.
Every day is a new challenge, a new opportunity to get everything right, and another chance to experience. In sadness, happiness takes place.
Photo credits to Vivid Screen.